For the love of a child

Back in my teaching days, I gave a math problem to my class of pre-literate grade one students. I read the problem aloud and then asked the kids to illustrate the scenario on a piece of paper.

“Three ants were on a picnic table. Two crawled off. How many ants are left on the table?”

I collected the papers and began marking them. Some of the ants were skinny, others plump. But it was Andrea’s illustration that took me by surprise. She had drawn, in vivid colour and detail, three women with long skirts crawling on their hands and knees across a large table. These were the “aunts” enjoying a delicious picnic lunch!

Children can put an effortless smile on our faces. Their innocence, clever antics, simple faith all bring a refreshing hiatus to our hectic lives.

Despite (or maybe because of) this fact, children are often at the centre of political debate, moral uncertainty, and cultural upheaval.

Currently, controversy swirls around the topic of international adoption. The media accuses celebrities of treating children like commodities when stars such as Madonna hand over exorbitant amounts of cash and bypass standard processes to adopt from Third World countries. People say this is nothing more than nouveau colonialism – a way of exerting Western dominance over those less fortunate. The fact that couples can choose the race, gender, and age of their children adds to the furor.

Within the Christian community, international adoption is a desirable choice for many families. Some of these parents grapple with infertility, while others are simply moved to tears after watching the nightly news.

Is international adoption a way of following Jesus’ command to care for “the least of these?” Or would it be more appropriate to focus our efforts on international relief to ensure there will be fewer impoverished or orphaned children (especially due to the AIDS pandemic) in the future? What about the 90% of eligible children left unadopted each year in Canada?

Is it right to welcome an internationally adopted child into a North American home with its bountiful resources and blessings? Is it imperative that we rescue these children from their plight? Or is it best to allow them to stay in their birth country to be raised and nurtured by kin within their native culture?

And, more pointedly, should we be able to pick and choose our children so glibly?

There’s a fine ethical line here; it’s the subtle difference between treating children as sacred gifts and treating them as commodities.

Before making any decision that will permanently affect the life of a child, we must examine our hearts. We can be fueled by the anticipation of alleviating our personal pain, or by the desire to care for the world’s children. Sometimes our hearts carry a strange mix of both. Does our motivation come from selfish want, or does it come from a larger view of God’s kingdom and a heart for the innocents?

Ultimately, the decision to adopt or not adopt must be shaped by the Word of God. Scripture says we have an obligation to care for every child, no matter where they’re born. There are millions and millions of children around the world who need a home, who need love and care. This care must be offered without prejudice, pride, or selfish ambition.

In the final words of the Old Testament, the prophet paints a surprising picture of what God expects from his people: “[The prophet] will turn the hearts of the parents to their children, and the hearts of the children to their parents; or else I will come and strike the land with total destruction” (Malachi 4:6). In essence, God is looking for people to care for the weak and vulnerable – the children! The Lord desires healthy and loving relationships between adults and children everywhere.

The New Testament affirms the significance of these relationships when it announces John the Baptist’s ministry: “And he will go on before the Lord, . . . to turn the hearts of the parents to their children . . . to make ready a people prepared for the Lord” (Luke 1:17). We can prepare ourselves for the coming of God’s kingdom (and for Jesus’ message) by turning our hearts towards children.

This issue of the Herald is designed to do just that. Feature articles such as “One mean mama” and “Bringing home baby” give insight into the joyful, complicated, God-ordained relationship between parents and children. “A daughter chosen by God” is the story of one family’s journey into the world of international adoption.

In the end, the way we treat our children, whether natural or adopted, is a measure of our souls. To love a child well is to herald the coming of God’s kingdom.