A daughter chosen by God

God is taking our family on an adventure. John and I have four beautiful children – Bryn (12), Joel (11), Luke (9), and a daughter whom we have not yet met. She is six, but may be as young as five or as old as seven. Someone else has named her, though we will add to her name when we meet. Hopefully we will bring her home soon. I can’t describe her character or interests yet, but I can tell you she’s been chosen for our family by a God she may never have heard of.

We are frequently asked, “What led you to the decision to adopt a child?” Over the years, John and I read books about China and its culture. With a tender spot in our hearts for China and learning of the millions of orphaned children around world, we inquired about the possibility of international adoption. My parents joined us in prayer, but at that time, we felt it wasn’t the right decision.

Seven years later, the idea reintroduced itself. John said, “If we’re going to do it, we should do it now.”

Including the children

We knew we needed to include our children in the decision. John asked Joel how he would feel about adopting a little sister. His response, brief and matter-of-fact, was that it was a good idea and we should do it right away.

The next evening we introduced the idea to Bryn and Luke. Their immediate reaction was joy and excitement. We explained the practical realities to them: one more body in the van on road trips; sharing a bedroom; putting plans for a trip to Disneyland on hold for several years as vacation money would be diverted to adoption and travel costs.

There were questions, but never any hesitation. A day or two later, Bryn recounted the story of a boy who was working diligently to pick up starfish scattered on the seashore at low tide. Responding to a man who suggested he was wasting his time with so many starfish to save, the boy picked up another and said, “It makes a difference to this one.”

“There are so many children in this world starving and without a family, but we can make a difference in the life of this one little girl,” Bryn said.

From the moment they were able to understand, we made our children aware there are people in this world who need our help, prayer, and sympathy. We’ve prayed daily for our World Vision child, Muteba. Our children enjoy participating in Operation Christmas Child, Project Love, and Love Winnipeg. At times, they’ve offered their entire allowance for hampers given to struggling families in their school. We’ve made our children aware of their responsibility to help others because of the abundant blessings Christ has given us.

People ask us many questions about our daughter. Is she already chosen for you? Are there any medical concerns? We often get the sense that, although they want answers to these questions, their real questions are: Are the risks very high? Are you afraid?

Living fearlessly

Are we afraid? Do we feel we’re not living cautiously? When we reopened this chapter, there were fears and lack of peace. We knew first-hand of families who had struggles with their adopted children. Fear did become part of our thoughts.

But as we prayed, studied the Bible, and thought of past experiences when God was faithful we knew we didn’t have to be afraid. God has promised us so many amazing things. One of God’s many messages to us, from Hebrews 11, is that he will never fail and will bless the faithful. God is the worker of this miracle, as he was with our other children.

None of the Bible’s promises say that life will be easy. But we know that through the power of the Holy Spirit, we can have joy. And with our eyes fixed on Jesus, we can do anything.

Waiting

At times, it’s hard to wait. We feel frustration when we receive an e-mail indicating it may be longer than originally anticipated before our daughter arrives. I have an ache within to hug and kiss my little girl, tuck her in at night, and know what she’s involved with on a daily basis.

It’s a blessing to hear our other three children speak of her by name and offer a prayer on her behalf. It brings a smile to my face when I hear Luke ask the Lord to keep her safe and help her know there’s a family waiting for her and loving her. It warms my heart when Bryn and Joel tell me things they plan to do with her to help her learn English. It touches my heart to recall John’s glossy eyes as he listened to the song “All I Want for Christmas is a Family.”

We all wish she were here yesterday!

Brenda and her husband John Olfert are members of McIvor Ave. MB Church, Winnipeg. This is an excerpt from a testimony Brenda shared at a women’s retreat.