The family of God

The family is under attack. On every side corrosive forces gnaw at its structures and try to erode its foundations. From the attempts by governments to expand its boundaries, to its disparagement in the media, to overt or seemingly benign neglect by those who should know better – the family is bombarded from within and without.

But has it ever been different? The family was instituted when, at the dawn of creation, God said, “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and they will become one flesh” (Genesis 2:24). But with the introduction of sin into the world an unrelenting attack on the family began and has continued unabated ever since.

Villainous characters have hidden in its branches. Among them, many of the leaders of Israel brought shame to the words “father,” “son,” and “husband.” Their wives, daughters and mothers proved that evil is not restricted by gender. And so, for some, “family” became synonymous with abuse of power.

Moral collapse also succeeded in leaving its mark on family values. Lot’s bizarre proposal to turn his daughters over to the madmen of Sodom and Gomorrah might have reflected cultural courtesy to strangers but was an astonishing affront to parental stewardship. And so, for some, “family” became associated with depravity.

Social engineers too came up with alternative proposals for family. Sparta was not the first society to suggest that parents might not be best teachers of a society’s children but it certainly was not the last. And so, the name “family” has often been taken over by anyone with alternative ideas about social contracts.

It was, however, God who gave the family to humanity. In different cultures and ages its veneer has taken on different hues but it was God who defined its essence and laid out its principles and because He has done so, the family will stand. We don’t need to defend the idea of family; we need to show our culture what family is supposed to look like.

While God gave the family to all humanity, He gave – as part of the New Covenant – His people the church. The church too has been under unrelenting attack since its inception. From the outside its enemies launch their assaults while from within there is a restless search for novelty.

It too has had a legion of villains hiding in its foliage and abusing its name. Its structures have been used by tyrants and psychopaths in both grand and very intimate schemes, from international conflicts to hidden abuse. And so, for some, this abuse defines “church.”

The church also suffers when moral decay overtakes its host culture. Too often, rather than being salt in the midst of decay and light in darkness, the church has been a chameleon blending into the background, whether in ancient Rome defined by the Coliseum or in modern, western society defined by Hollywood. And so, for some, “church” is merely the veneer culture uses to hide its abuses.

And, like the idea of “family,” the idea of “church” has been the subject of social experiments. Some are highly structured like John Calvin’s Geneva or the various monastic communities. Other experiments are anti-structural, glorifying deconstruction and ambiguity, believing that “church” is a fluid, mystical concept that defies any human structure. And so, for some, “church” is just another tool in the latest social sales pitch.

Like the family, the church adapts itself to various times and cultures. But, like the family, the church was not instituted by humanity but was ordained by God. Jesus introduced it with the declaration, “I will build my church, and the gates of Hades will not overcome it” (Matthew 16:18). In fact, “church” is the family of those born of the Spirit. The church will survive, not because we defend it so effectively, but because of Who upholds it.

Neither family nor church are whatever we choose to make them. Both have organization, rules, core values and a mandate. Both are divinely conceived and give expression to the holiness, love and perfection of the Creator of the universe. But both demand that their adherents work out these divine ideals in a fallen, corrupted world. Small wonder that paradox seems to follow both.

The family and the church are under attack. We should expect nothing less. But if God instituted the family and Jesus established the church then possibly we need to spend less time defending and innovating and more time using them for their purpose – demonstrating the character of God both within and without.

James Toews is pastor of Neighbourhood Church, Nanaimo, B.C.