No longer afraid of death

Mary Cho, above, attends Willingdon Church, Burnaby, B.C.

I always hesitated to talk about death. The most hateful word for me was death because my imagination drew many different pictures in my mind: fear, darkness, sadness, coldness and guilt. I didn’t know how to console or comfort people who lost their loved ones. Although I was a sincere Christian, I had no idea what to pray for the people who were facing death in the hospital. I often felt numb and immature when attending friends’ funeral services.

My conflict seemed to derive from inexperience with life and death from the perspective of a typical Christian. I was born and grew up in a Christian family and received the disciplines of Christianity in school and home. But I never experienced a personal relationship with God. I simply learned about going to church on Sundays and obeying all the rules in the Bible in order to be a better person than non-Christians.

Moreover, I was uncertain where I came from and how I could go to heaven, even though I knew it existed somewhere. I was taught that I had to live for God and that He made us in His image. But I had no clue how to grow my faith. I was always in doubt.

One day, my beloved God came to me and inspired my spirit to understand more about the mysterious dogma, especially the true meaning of death and life. In 1999, God called me into the valley of death. Literally, I was on the edge of death due to cancer. I didn’t realize that He was waiting for a long time to call me.

God showed me how holy and forgiving He is. He carried me along in His peace and comfort, telling me He wanted to clean my body, soul, and even blood. He was whispering to me that I was filthy and sinful as I was. He was promising me a new life after death.

After my complete recovery, I became born again and a free person in God. I am now a five-year-old Christian child who is extremely happy about who and what I am. Now the word death stands for life, brightness, joy and true hope for me. No fear of death covers my soul and I am walking into His presence deeper and nearer than ever before. I am willing to serve Him to the end. I praise Him constantly. He is my Lord.

As Easter approaches, I truly feel the resurrection is my personal issue. It is not merely something in doctrine or just an event. I thank God every morning because Christ is risen and so am I.